Who are you?

I was listening to a podcast this morning, and the host made the point that with COVID and lockdown, many of us are suffering with stress and depression because of our self identification with our jobs, our self appointed roles. And that’s a very long sentence! In more ways than one!

But the point struck home with me. More to do with my job, but I guess the point to be made is easier with the following.

At points in my life I was a punk, I was a skater, amongst other things and I self identified with these “tribes”.

I still listen to some punk, but listen to a lot of other genres too, but I’m a lot older now and have no need to self identify with that tribe. No more scene politics, no scene police, just enjoying music for what it is.

It’s not that I don’t care, it’s that I’ve chosen not to self identify with something that causes conflict, is that a better way of saying it?

This could apply equally to football, to clubs, associations, area codes, whatever.

Ego is the enemy.

It is our own opinions that disturb us. Take away these opinions then, and resolve to dismiss your judgment about an act as if it were something grievous, and your anger is gone.” – Marcus Aurelius

Natural Born Talent… part two

Took a while to get back to this thought! So much has been going on recently!

So I saw a post by Steve Caballero over on Instagram, and it summed up perfectly the point I was trying to make in that last post…

People see the end result – they are the success and the skill obtained through patience, hard work, the grind, hustle, practise, planning, self sacrifice and so on.

And they ascribe it to ‘talent”

Is there a reason for this? Maybe.

Could it be because people know deep down inside what it takes to be a success, to be seen as a talented individual, and they don’t have it in them? Or they aren’t prepared to sacrifice so much to, in their eyes, “make it”

It’s all within our reach, as Marcus Aurelius once stated “Because a thing seems difficult for you, do not think it impossible for anyone to accomplish.”

Have an awesome day!

PMA and dogs.

How lucky are dogs! “They have no preconceived notions of their limitations”! And that is exactly who we should see our own lives! Children have no concept of their limitations until it’s drummed into them, but imagine the possibilities without limitations!

Because your own strength is unequal to the task, do not assume that it is beyond the powers of man; but if anything is within the powers and province of man, believe that it is within your own compass also. – Marcus Aurelius

Of course if your strength is unequal right now, that becomes a goal to work towards so you can achieve your aim, but limitations are in the “enemy mind”.

Jesus, Plato and the Negatrons.

A strange thing can happen to you when you begin the journey of bettering yourself. Friends turn into strangers sometimes. and that can be a good thing. It kind of brings to mind the bible story of the rejection at Nazareth – “…56Aren’t all His sisters with us as well? Where then did this man get all these things?” 57And they took offense at Him. But Jesus said to them, “Only in his hometown and in his own household is a prophet without honor. 58And He did not do many miracles there, because of their unbelief.… “(Matthew 13:56-58 for the biblically inclined amongst you)

Why am I bibling at you? Follow me and I’ll explain..

Imagine you are in a dark cave, and you are chained together with 5 or 6 other people. You cannot see behind you, but you are aware of a fire behind you, and the light is casting shadows on the cave wall directly in front of you. What do you do now? Well you eventually come to accept this is your lot in life, to the point these shadows you see cast are your reality now. if you try and grope blindly out, towards where you can feel the breeze, the prisoners chained to you, whether out of fear, or something worse, drag you back… “IT’S FOR YOUR OWN GOOD!”

One day, the Prisoner escapes. “Come with me!” and they cry back “NO” whether out of fear, or something worse, they want to stay in their caves.

The Prisoner escapes and learns the true substance of the world outside of the cave. He returns to the cave once more, but his eyes, unused to the shadows of the cave now, render him blind at first… The prisoners see this as proof that there is no use in escaping, and drag the Prisoner back down with them.

I see the “Rejection at Nazareth” story as the biblical version of Plato’s allegory of the cave. Those familiar to Jesus, knowing him previous to his ministry sought to denigrate the mission. The Prisoner in the cave, moved beyond the cave, and attempted to increase his knowledge of the world, and then he too was denigrated when he tried to share his new found knowledge. And who were these people, without faith and full of fear? NEGATRONS!

What the hell is a Negatron? Well they are negative influences in your life. You know the guy who who asks you to go to the bar and you say “No, its all good bro” and he replies “Haw haw! I remember when you were a fuck up like the rest of us, you think you’re better than me?!”. Negatrons are the people who say “Why even try? You’re too old! You’re too young! You’re too fat! That’s not for the likes of us” You know these people, they might be old friends, or sometimes family. And you need to keep these people at an arm’s distance at least. AT LEAST. Preferably a really long arm. Like Plastic Man’s arm length away.

It’s crazy when you think you are pretty much the sum of the 5 people you spend the most time with. Which is awesome because it makes me 20% staffordshire bull terrier! But think on that, if you spend most of your time with 5 negative people, you slowly become the sum of their parts. Think on it! IT’S MADNESS! MULTI-BALL MADNESS! It’s also crazy to think that Jesus had salty haters on his brief. Also, this is the plot of the Matrix.

“Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life son.”

Consistency is key to everything in your life, both positive and negative.

An example, is how the hell did I end up fat, drunk and stupid?

By CONSISTENTLY eating crap, CONSISTENTLY making terrible choices and refusing to accept my responsibilities and CONSISTENTLY neglecting self education.

How do I fix this?

By CONSISTENTLY eating healthy foods and working out, CONSISTENTLY accepting responsibility for my own actions and CONSISTENTLY engaging myself in reading and learning with focus.

Dean Wormer from the Animal House movie.


Yesterday, I did something I hadn’t done in maybe 20 years. Now I love skateboarding, in all its forms. I street skated for years, curbs, blocks, ledges, benches. From around when I was 12, much of my weekends and my weeknights sometimes were spent looking for freestanding curbs, waxing them, seeing it turn into a bust, moving on. Some places were police/security free, and then as I grew older, I got the fear.

What might happen? What if? What if I break my arm? (did manage to shatter my elbow, and got berated by my then boss) and I’d also let people get into my head, was I doing this trick wrong? Someone told me I was doing it wrong. I stopped doing it, unsure of myself now. I was the generation where we sat there looking at trick tips – photo sequences in magazines, I’d watch Streets of Fire over at someone’s house or maybe The Search for Animal Chin.

So I settled. And remembered what was awesome, but fell into “adulthood”, later than some but the “fun” now seemed to involve regret and coming down. And you know something, it went against every value I’d been brought up to believe in, and that, can send you into a spiral. I’ll probably go into this more in a later post. I still skated, on and off over the years, never really got into park skating though.

Anyways! What did I do? I skated town for the first time in maybe 20 years. A friend suggested it, and yeah I’m onboard! (Thank you brother!) We went and rolled around, I searched for the old spots, now mostly gone, found some new ones, met some guys who ride electric unicycle wheel things, saw some longboarders, even some rollerbladers. People who were stoked on life. The sun was out, I slammed pretty hard, life was awesome.

Positive thinking does not work.

I see this sentiment written in so many self help books. “Thinking positive thoughts doesn’t change anything” the reasoning being that PMA will leave you feeling “inadequate” if it doesn’t banish that negative energy, whatever it may be. So if positive thinking does not work, what does? Well their answer is accepting the negative thoughts, but then controlling your actions.


The essence of Positive Mental Attitude is the fact that we choose how we react to something and what our action is from that point on!

Sometimes I feel as though some writers think PMA is an outdated concept, and they have to deride it, dress it up in new clothes, and call it SUPRANORMALCOMBATIVEBRAINMODE! (by the way, SNCBM is all mine! No stealsies!)

Positive Mental Attitude is the concept that we are free to control our minds, and to direct emotions, moods, feelings, attitudes, habits etc. with the intention of making a positive choice every time. And if we fail, or make a mistake, we take it as a learning experience and move one!